


Never coming home

by Albenkind



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Hurt, M/M, Mentions of Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-17
Updated: 2015-03-17
Packaged: 2018-03-18 08:11:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3562496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Albenkind/pseuds/Albenkind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I didn't know you were still alive. I thought you dead. We all did."<br/>"You could have thought twice about it."<br/>"Brother-"<br/>"You left me there, Thor. You left me."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never coming home

**Author's Note:**

> For newspaper-cigarettes and the prompt "Come home with me."

"Come home with me." Thor asked quietly. 

His voice was low, tender. Soft. Even though he had troubles keeping his voice up. It was about to break but he desperately hoped Loki would not notice. Everything so Loki would finally, see reason. But his brother would not come home. How often had he asked him to please come back to him. If not to Odin, then for everything holy - for him. But Thor had lost count. He was tired of counting the days and the amount of times he had tried to convince Loki to come back home. 

"You passed up the golden opportunity, Thor." 

"Loki please, I didn't-"

"You didn't _what_?! You didn't think bringing my body back with you was worth your time! You didn't think I was important enough! It's always the same. Give me _one_ good reason why I should even _think_ about coming back home with you!!" Loki spat and Thor could feel his heart break all over again. Loki's poisonous words always hurt, but seeing the expression in his eyes was almost worse. There was so much hate and oh- Thor could see the pain. 

Loki always looked like he remembered and Thor never asked why. His robes were still dirty and he could clearly see the dried blood that was tainting his robes with a blueish colour. His face was paler than he was back on the day of Thor's coronation all those years ago. And Thor could clearly see those dark grey cracks shimmering through his skin when he was standing there like this. 

It was night again and one of those nights where Loki would visit him in his room. The sun was almost gone behind the clouds that never left the sky of Asgard ever since the incident in Svartalfheim so Loki looked even paler in the faint moonlight. 

"I didn't know you were still alive. I thought you dead. We all did."

"You could have thought twice about it."

"Brother-"

"You left me there, Thor. _You left me_. Asking me to come home forever is something I won't do. You should stop trying. I have a new home and a new life. You will _never_ be a part of it."

Thor didn't know what to do. He sat in his sofa, lips pressed together tightly as he tried to hold back his tears. Why was Loki like this? Why? Didn't he see that Thor was sorry? If he could, he would undo everything. He would go back and take Loki back with him. How could he have possibly known that he had been alive? He'd stopped breathing. His heart had stopped beating. And it had taken Loki weeks to come back and reveal that he was still alive. 

Odin had been in shock as well. And all their friends. But neither of them had been as affected by this as Thor. Seeing Loki come back... He'd thought that everything would go back to normal. That he would be his Loki again. His little brother whom he loved so much. 

But ever since Loki came back, he had presented himself as bitter. Angry and in utter pain. 

Thor wanted to take this pain away from him. He wished he could take all of this away and show him that it could be like all those years ago. 

"Loki please. _Please_ , tell me what I can do to make it up to you."

Silence.

"Loki, talk to me."

But Loki didn't. He just stood by the window for a very long time and Thor never took his eyes off of him. He was so beautiful even with clear signs of a battle. He had always been beautiful to Thor. But then, finally, Loki spoke up.

"It was a mistake to come here again. I thought visiting you would change something. But it doesn't."

"What do you thought would change? Please, I'll do what it takes."

Instead of answering, Loki turned to look at Thor and looked like he wanted to say something for quite some time, then he walked up to him, past him - towards the door. Thor could clearly hear how his door was opened. He could hear footsteps and then the door fell back into its lock again so Thor wasn't able to hear the footsteps anymore. It made him turn around, gasping and standing up from his chair hectically. 

" _Loki_!!" 

***

" _Loki_!!"

Thor's voice boomed through the halls of Asgard. Sif put her hand on her mouth to suppress a sob. Again. The healers had done their best. But nothing seemed to help him. She turned and walked back from the window, back to where the warriors three were sitting, running her hand through her hair. 

"How long do you think this will go on?" Fandral asked and Sif shook her head.

"I don't know. But it's been almost a year now."

Hogun sighed. "I never would've thought Thor would imagine Loki being here."

"Hallucinations are not common in Asgard. The trauma of losing both Frigga and Loki in such a short amount of time was too much. He didn't even have time to grieve because of Malekith." Sif answered, recalling what the healer told her earlier. 

"Is there really nothing we can do?" Volstagg asked, gesturing helplessly with his hands.

"No. We can't."

**Author's Note:**

> (The basic idea was based on the fact that a lot of children develop an imaginary friend after going through a traumatising experience.)


End file.
